weddings

Want Cash Instead Of Wedding Gifts? Here's How To Ask Without Being Tacky

Please don't buy us a toaster. 

So you don’t want knives or pots and pans. Especially if you live in a small apartment, who needs boxes and boxes of useless — and large — stuff being delivered?

What you want is cash gifts for your wedding, but you don’t know how to ask. Seri Kertzner, founder of Little Miss Party Planner, is here to help. She gives cash for every wedding she attends, "like a Bar Mitzvah,” she laughs. But seriously, most couples would rather have the money to do what they please; they just don’t know how to ask without turning their guests off.

The quick answer is, "Yes, it’s tacky,” Kertzner tells Personal Space, but “instead of asking for straight up cash, you can set up funds for people to contribute cash to buy what you want. That’s a very tasteful way of asking for cash.”

Seri once received a shower invite that read “monetary gifts appreciated,” and says she found that to be another way to tastefully get the message across you’re not looking for any new appliances.

“I would be mortified if I saw people just outright asking for money,” she adds.

The couple could just not register at all and hope people are smart enough to give you cash, but many people will go rogue and attempt to pick something that you, of course, will hate.

“People may start buying you ugly, weird candlesticks you don’t need,” Kertzner says.

She says you’d have to be "really hard up" for cash to throw a big wedding (with cash) then ask for more.

“If you’re throwing a wedding, you have cash,” Kertzner says, adding, “I give cash at every wedding; most New Yorkers do."

“It would probably not mortify people to give cash in a cutesy type of way. Include a card that says, 'We have everything we need, all we really require is your presence. If you feel so obliged, a monetary gift would be appreciated.' That would be the least tacky way to go. A wedding means you’re starting your life together, probably buying a house; giving cash makes the most sense to me as a wedding gift. For a shower or an engagement, you can give things off the registry."

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